Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Ego, is not a dirty word.


A sentiment I don't tend to agree with.


There are many instances were having too much of an Ego can be, and is, a negative thing.


However, there are instances where having an ego (or confidence) is a good thing.


When is the right time to be confident, egotistical [ego-testical for those who remember those days?] or when is it best, to just shut up, smile and be pretty?

I guess I'm falling into a gender trap here. That if I'm flaunting my ego, then I'm not being feminine. Why do I feel that way? I shouldn't. Realistically. I can be a confident woman without it being a real issue, right? yet, it doesn't really feel that way.

I guess a lot of this stems from a deep inner psyche - my own issues with gender roles in society and in my own life. That girls should be seen and not heard, and yet... I'm not that. Not even a little a bit.

I want to say I'm confident in myself - and I don't feel that should be a negative thing.

But the truth is a lot more complicated than that.

At times I am boisterous and obnoxious (read: confident) but realistically I am just as insecure and nervous as the next person, if not more.

Facade? maybe. Question is, why do I need it? Or better yet, why do I want it? 

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